So normally I would know what to write but this time I'm just going to let my mind wander off a little bit... I've been gong through some rough time these past 2 months and its been really hard. Feeling alone in this world is not a good feeling at all and especially when you know you have friends but its like who can you trust now a days? Now a days people are so fake. I just try to keep in my own space and I try not to bother or talk to a lot of people because people have your backs now but you never know what can happen tomorrow. Honestly I don't care if I'm alone in this world, I can be independent and do my own thing, things changed a lot this year and I am noticing it slowly and people are not the same and it hurts because the people who I used to be close with and hang out with every single day I no longer associate with but that's just the way life is I guess. When you feel empty inside, who do you run to? When you feel alone and hurt inside, what's your escape? Well, I have no escape.. I feel empty, hurt, betrayed, melancholy, and I have no one to run to. Yeah there's people who say that they'll always be there for you but honestly you know that won't last a long time. You know that sooner or later they'll turn their backs on you and make you feel so alone that you know you have nobody to run to. That's what's happening with me and it sucks. I don't usually like talking about my problems to no one because either they judge you or just wanna listen to everything you've been through and just be nosy. I rather write it all out and just get it out instead of talking to someone, it helps sometimes but at times you know that sooner or later writing is going to get old. You know that you need a friend, that you need someone's shoulder to always be there whenever you're feeling sad and want to cry your eyes out, that you want a friend to actually tell you "Hey don't worry, everything will be okay I promise" but sometimes it just doesn't work out that way. Well at least not for me I don't think. I got it bad. But think about it this way, there's people that got it way worse than me right now and that are just at the edge and don't know what to do and are just about to give up. I know that giving up is the wrong thing to do because I didn't make it this far for nothing and deep down I know that things will get better but right now? I just don't know. Everyone always tells me "keep your head up Karina, stay positive and everything will be fine" but really they have no clue what's going on in my life right now or what I've been through, I've tried staying positive and keeping my head up but IT'S SO HARD! I wonder if my life is going to get better soon... Let's just wait and see.